Do not delete is out of politeness, do not contact just do not feel necessary.
Zhihu saw a question: a person does not delete or block you, but there is no contact, is there any hope?
the person who asks the question is full of expectation, but the person who answers it touches his heart:
"the essence of people is to need each other and keep warm each other. If there is a new substitute, there is no need for intersection."
those who do not block you, but never take the initiative to contact you, there must be a more important existence around him.
this is probably what happens in the world.
it is polite not to delete, and it just doesn't feel necessary not to contact.
the estrangement between people begins with nothing to say
once chatted all night and sympathized with each other.
I don't know when to start. I don't want to say what I didn't say, and people who are "visible for three days" don't bother to see it.
if you don't contact me, I won't contact you. Slowly, we will fade away.
some time ago, when I went home on May Day, there was no necessary arrangement. Basically, I stayed at home.
seeing that I had nothing to do at home, my mother said to me, "I saw Cheng Cheng coming back two days ago, and I told him that you were at home these days. You two had such a good time when you were young, why didn't you get in touch and go out for a get-together?"
hearing this, my heart suddenly felt helpless and bitter.
Yes, when did the friend who wanted to break up half of his food and made an appointment to "share blessings and troubles" began to break off contact and finally drifted away?
probably, it is that our lives do not overlap, our interests and hobbies are very different after work, and gradually we do not have a common language.
maybe, later, we each have new friends, joys and sorrows, and new partners to share and talk to.
again, it is possible that everyone becomes very busy after getting married, each has its own family to take care of, and we don't see each other twice a year.
so, on a normal night, after saying good night to each other, it seemed like a tacit understanding formed over the years, and then there was no more contact.
occasionally learned that the other person was in a bad mood through WeChat moments. I opened Wechat to comfort him, only to find that the chat record stopped a year ago, and the sentence "how are you" was typed and deleted in the chat box.
Adult relationships are sometimes really fragile, even if they have gone through a difficult road together, and then they become silent and estranged when they have less contact.
when we say goodbye, there are only polite pleasantries in addition to the smiles of sarcasm.
No deletion, no blocking, no interrupting is the last decency of this relationship.
for those who don't care about you, that's it
in the lyrics:
"there are always unexpected encounters and unexpected love in this world. Of course, there are also unexpected goodbyes and nostalgia."
in this world, everyone's energy is limited, and so is his heart.
behind those silent relationships, there are actually signs that they are no longer moved, without exception.
in the variety show "Friends Please listen up", a girl named Ye sent for help:
she and her boyfriend have been in love for 10 years, and the relationship has been so good that they have reached the point of talking about marriage.
but just a few days ago, her boyfriend suddenly said to her calmly:
"for ten years, my feelings for you have not been as warm as before. If you still want to get married, it is OK, but I am only a kind of responsibility to you."
the boyfriend confessed without any sign, leaving the girl's mind blank.
everyone was silent after hearing this. The truth was already there, but they just didn't know how to speak.
or he Xun kindly reminded her: "it is possible that after tasting other passions, he feels that he is only insipid with you."
if this is the case, I suggest you not to go through it hard, because not every relationship can last for 10 years. If you are wrong, you can't continue the previous mistake to avoid the next one. "
Yes, how many ten years can there be in a person's life?
I am joyfully sketching our future, but you are planning to leave.
I used to like a saying: the sun is right, the breeze is not dry, meet the people you want to see, do what you want to do.
now I just feel that life is full of helplessness and regret.
how many blacklists have said good night to each other; more or less special attention, and later become strangers.
those names that do not disturb or contact are full of innumerable nights that are hard to fall asleep and unspeakable.
think about it, whose life is not wearing red, but also hanging green.
as Zheng Zhan wrote in "eating alive", "breaking up partners is the norm of life, and we are no exception."
when two people who have been in love lie quietly on each other's list, it shows that the relationship has long been indifferent.
therefore, if you don't get a response to love, stop your loss in time; if you change your heart, let it go as soon as possible.
the most important thing is to try to live a good life right now. Some people just meet them, and forget it for the rest of their lives.
Don't overestimate your relationship with anyone
in the Story of the Pipa, there is a sentence widely circulated:
"I would have turned my heart to the moon, but the moon shines on the ditch."
means that one person really treats another person, but the other person is indifferent and ungrateful.
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there are many moments when we can't help but attach great importance to our relationship with others.
"I have a close relationship with him, and he won't help me with this small favor."
"We all talked about it.After all these years, the relationship is so good that he won't leave me; "
"he is so kind to me that he will tolerate all my shortcomings."
but not until the true heart is disappointed, the true love is taken advantage of, and the sincerity is deceived.
nothing is immutable. People are fickle. Never overestimate your relationship with anyone.
We thought our close friends would reach out and give them a hand, but the other person mercilessly refused.
We thought that a strong lover would wait for you all the time, and the other person left when they had a new goal.
We think that intimate lovers will always be tolerant, and each other will be tired when they are halfway away.
there is a good word: deep love does not last long, wisdom is bound to hurt.
what people fear most is that they overestimate their position in the hearts of others.
in this world, you may know a lot of people, but there are very few people who really care about you.
remembering that Sha Yi once lamented in a program:
"one night I looked through my phone and found that no one left me a message except for my son.
I used to think that I was very important, but in fact, everyone is not that important in the hearts of others. "
there are too many stories with no ending. We can't ask every encounter to have an ending. Cherish it when you meet it, and let it go if you miss it.
most of the time, what makes us lose is not the result itself, but too much self-expectation.
Friendship or love.
"I'll pick you up when you come, but if you go, I won't send you off. If you love me, I'll stay with you to the end. If not, I'll pretend you've never been here."
this is a world that likes to say goodbye, but none of us are good at it.
A lot of times, when I turn around, I find that some people in my life have disappeared.
Don't be angry with those who leave or hurt you.
to live up to your debt and fade away from each other is also a thank you for his name's occupation in your life for many years.
if you have a chance to contact again, you can still say hello politely;
if life is over, say goodbye and turn away.
the night is still long, and so is the rest of my life.
Don't waste your time on someone who isn't worth it, and don't lose yourself for someone who isn't worth it.
, I hope all the deep feelings in the world will not be disappointed, and all the encounters can come as scheduled!