A person's top self-cultivation is to respect people who are different from you.
I especially like what Mr. Lian Yue said:
"not caring about and not intervening in other people's private affairs and allowing others to have different morals and lifestyles will eliminate more than 90% of the troubles in the world."
there are never two identical leaves in this world.
everyone's living environment is different, their values and lifestyle are also different.
to understand and ask others with their own values and way of life is actually selfish.
A person's highest self-cultivation is to respect people who are different from you.
Zhihu once had a hot topic with tens of thousands of likes: "what's it like to have been to more than 100 countries?"
A respondent who was born in 1985 and traveled around more than 100 countries
, there is a sentence that has aroused a strong resonance among netizens.
"understand that there is no so-called natural and absolute political correctness in this world, and can accept that other people have different values and derived ways of thinking."
when we have met a lot of people and been to many places, we will understand:
in addition to rice, noodles and bread, there are people in the world whose staple foods are potatoes, beans, corn, highland barley, and even fried bananas.
A society with monogamy, polygamy, polyandry and even matrilineal clans;
in some places, funerals are grand and complicated, and everyone is very sad, while in other places, one person dies and the whole family plays music and dance.
the rebellion in one person's eyes is likely to be natural and natural in the eyes of another.
the world is diverse, not single.
all values and lifestyles have their own unique reasons, there is no high or low, there is no right or wrong.
when we understand this, we won't easily make a fuss about things we don't understand.
in recent years, there has been a popular view that you can't be friends if you don't agree with each other.
so, what exactly is the disagreement between the three values?
you say durian is fragrant and nutritious, but I can't smell it at all. This is not called disagreement among the three values, but it is called different taste.
if you like durian and think that if I don't like it, you don't know how to appreciate it and laugh at my lack of taste, this is the difference between the three values.
in an interview, Luo Yonghao shared his mental journey.
he said that when he was young, he was particularly disgusted with people with superstitious ideas.
those who believe in fengshui and bow down when they see the statue of the Buddha are very disdainful, let alone make friends with them.
the bigger the business, the greater the risks and responsibilities you take.
their worship is just a way to relieve stress, neither hurting others nor hurting themselves.
so he began to change his mind slowly. Although he didn't believe it, he began to try to understand and accept people who were different from himself, and there were more and more friends around him.
there is an old saying: "A gentleman is harmonious but different."
everyone has their own unique preferences and personalities. When you learn to respect people who are different from yourself, your self-cultivation will enter a higher level.
host Chen Wenxi and writer Bai Xianyong are good friends.
for a time, Bai Xianyong's youth version of the Peony Pavilion caused a sensation on both sides of the strait, and many people were praising and discussing this work.
but Chen Wenxi is not interested at all.
after Bai Xianyong found out, in every exchange, he hardly talked about the performance of the youth version of the Peony Pavilion in front of Chen Wenxi, nor did he ask her to express her opinions.
Chen Wenxi said: "I am very grateful for this!" He can innovate, I can be stubborn, and no one will convince the other. "
this is a person's top self-cultivation, do not impose their preferences on the people around them.
when we were young, we learned a truth: "do not do to others what you do not want to do to others".
this is the most basic morality of a person. Don't impose on others what you don't like.
Zhou Guoping also put forward another powerful point, which is called "do not do to others what you want."
that is to say, don't impose on others what you like. This is a more advanced accomplishment.
you can like classics, but never look down on people who like to read online novels.
you do what you like, and then give other people's preferences back.
before he died, the famous psychologist Jung said a word to his apprentice:
"you don't even want to change others.
everyone's reaction to receiving sunlight is different. Some people feel dazzling, some feel warm, and some even avoid the sun. "
what you think of as a life full of fun and hope may also be a kind of pressure in the eyes of others.
writer Han Songluo has a friend named Lao Liu.
Lao Liu doesn't have a job and doesn't have any big ambitions. He lives on the rents of two properties left to him by his parents. He looks a little down and out.
but Lao Liu has a wonderful craftsmanship, making pottery, every piece is amazing.
Han Songluo felt unreconciled to Lao Liu-how could he be reduced to this situation when he was so talented?
Han Songluo quickly came up with an idea for Lao Liu and rented a pottery kiln! Mass production! Start the class and teach the apprentice! Open an online shop.
but looking back, Lao Liu looked frightened. This was not the life he wanted.
at first, Han Songluo could not get used to Lao Liu's "not striving for progress." it was not until a few years later that he gradually understood him.
"he can also live introverted and low, which is his right."
in fact, Han Songluo's story is not uncommon in life in recent years.
in life, many people are eager to use their own logic to change the views of the people around them and keep pace with them.
I look forward to marriage. I see other people fall in love and get married every day when they are 30 years old and don't have a boyfriend.
if you want to work hard in a first-tier city, you instill anxiety in people living in small cities all day long.
Oscar Wilde has a particularly reasonable saying:
"it is not selfish to live the life you want, but to ask others to live according to their own wishes."
everyone has their own comfortable way of life.
We can choose to live the life we want, but never tell others what to do.
you should know that every kind of life in this world is worthy of respect.
this is the most basic accomplishment of a person in a civilized society.
when I was young, I often disliked some people and things, thinking that the world was either black or white.
when I grow up, I gradually understand that it is not necessarily the fault of others to look at people badly.
between people, different growth conditions, different living environment, there will be different values.
there is no absolute right or wrong.
as long as the actions of others do not infringe upon their own and other people's interests.
Our prom dresses with sleeves are exactly what you need. Our collections are versatile enough to suit any figure.
then, all his actions deserve to be respected.
A person's top self-cultivation is finally learned, no longer always use his own cognition and values to understand the world.
begin to respect everyone who is different from their own aesthetics, character and values.
this is the highest state of respect for people.
, share with your friends.