The road should be taken step by step, and life should be lived by oneself little by little.
some people say: "the maturity of the world often begins with lowering expectations."
with age, more and more people find that:
Life is not to persist in moving forward, you are bound to encounter sunshine, and the satisfaction in fairy tales is usually only left in childhood.
in the adult world, not all encounters are joys, and not all expectations are surprises.
growing up has nothing to do with appearance, it is a process of gradually lowering expectations of others.
maturity has nothing to do with age, it is a state of mind that understands everything and lets nature take its course.
Don't expect too much from others
there is such a sentence:
"it is strangers who are most likely to feel warm and surprised, because there is no expectation for them;
the people who are most likely to feel sad and chill are those who are close to them, because you love them. "
once there are too many expectations in life, there are joys and sorrows.
I have read a fable.
an old woman came to the Zen master to cry and asked the Zen master, "they all say that all living beings are equal. Why are there so many happy people?"
the old woman said that when she was young, there were many children in the family, and her parents never had patience with her. she behaved well everywhere and wanted to be loved by her parents, but she never did.
"Why are other people's parents so good, but my parents are like this?" The old man confided to the Zen master.
after a young man gets married, her husband never says sweet words to her, nor does he give her a sense of ceremony on festivals and anniversaries, nor can he make a lot of money.
"Why are other people's husbands capable on the outside and on the inside?" The old man cried.
in old age, it is not easy to bring up the children, but they are only ordinary working class, each busy with life, have little time to see her, even care little.
"Why are other people's children so capable and happy?" The old man cried again.
the Zen master looked at the sad old man and said mercifully:
"from greed to hatred, from desire to bitterness, the root of your life's pain lies in your high expectations of the people around you.
in spite of bad parents, the good thing is that they raised you safely, the good thing is that your husband is bad, but he is honest and reliable, and even if his children are bad, they are good to start a family as adults.
you see, if you lower your expectations, there will be advantages in life. "
when things fail to fulfill one's wishes, things cannot come from the hearts of the people.
No one in the world can have everything going well, and it's hard for anyone to treat you the way you want.
people often say, "everything you ask for is bitter, and if you have no desire, you will be tough."
We often see in stories that everything can be what people want, but in real life, no one can live this life according to the template of happiness.
We must understand the truth that the world is always full of regrets. You can't change the world. The only thing you can do is to lower your expectations.
the greater the expectation, the greater the disappointment
there is a sentence in disqualification: "if there is no excessive joy, there is no extreme sadness."
whether it's a person or something, the higher your expectations, the more frustrated you will be.
A big V blogger shared such a story.
bloggers are shopping with friends in the mall, which is redeeming lucky boxes, in which the special prize is a new mobile phone.
the blogger didn't care about it at all. he felt that the chance of winning the special prize from the pile of lucky boxes was too small.
When you buy our white lace prom dress, you are on the right way to look cool and trendy. New glamorous arrivals are available now!
with a casual attitude, he chose a box and unexpectedly drew an umbrella. It was raining outside, and the blogger thought the prize was a pleasant surprise.
the blogger sighed in the article: "you really can't expect too much about life. If you expect more, you will be disappointed."
Yes, how can pie fall everywhere in the sky? only by keeping a normal mind can we reduce the gap in the face of the result.
expecting too much is sometimes a weapon to hurt yourself.
is like the famous Stockdale Paradox.
Stockdale was arrested and imprisoned.
Stockdale was tortured more than 20 times until his release eight years later.
but he got through it, and the companions who were locked up with him at the same time died one after another in the past eight years, even though some of them were in better shape than Stockdale.
some people marvel at his perseverance.
"I survived probably because I didn't have high expectations of being released, and they died because they had high expectations of being released.
they always hope to be pardoned at Christmas, but they fail to do so after Christmas.
so I thought Easter was OK, but it was not released.
Yu Guangzhong said:
expectation is a kind of half-awake and half-crazy burning.
Pingbai expects too much for the future, so when that day comes, they often face great grievances.
qualified adultsWill gradually understand that only by reducing the expectations of others, results, and everything from the outside, will we not fantasize, cling to, and demand it. Only in this way can we live every day comfortably.
abstain from sensitivity and lower expectations
an author once said: "too high expectations will make people feel a lot of unnecessary sensitivity."
Life is an one-man game, and life cannot all develop as expected.
reduce your expectations of others and increase your dullness in order to meet Enron, treat each other Enron, be in a safe state of mind, and smile Enron.
recently, in my spare time, I repainted the TV series Nirvana in Fire, in which a clip touched me very much.
Xiao Jingrui, originally the son of the family, has undergone major changes because of the feud of the previous generation, and everything around him has changed overnight.
some people think that he has become a joke, some people think that it will be difficult for him to deal with himself in the aristocratic circle of Jinling, and some people feel aggrieved for him.
because it was Mr. Su, whom he had always respected, that caused this situation.
this is tantamount to double harm to him.
but he was open-minded and still did what he had to do step by step.
facing the apologetic Mr. Su, he said:
"everyone always has a choice. You take what you think is important and abandon me. It's just your choice."
if I hold a grudge because I have not been chosen, isn't there too much unforgivable in this world? after all, no one has the responsibility to put me first.
living clumsily like me says: "everyone lives the same life in essence, but what is different is what your heart feels."
ask for nothing and be kind everywhere, don't drink and let the price of his wine be high.
everyone is a self-centered circle, there may be an intersection between circles, but it is difficult for others to put you completely in it.
you can't control other people's words and deeds, nor can you let others put you first. You can only take care of yourself, be honest with others, and let nature take its course.
the heart is not entangled, the heart is carefree, and the guest in the world is free.
always put your hope on yourself
Fudan talented woman Chen Guo said: "if people really have a lifelong partner, it is ourselves."
Adults have their own ideas and different worlds.
there are some things that others can't worry about you, and some things that others can't do for you.
it is always dangerous to pin your hopes on others and expect too much.
when you encounter difficulties, you can solve them on your own; you can only hope for the future you want.
Life is like this, the road should be taken step by step, and life should be lived by oneself little by little.
if you put your hope on yourself, you will not be afraid of having no one to depend on.
only by relying on your own body can you continue to grow and face life calmly.